Met new friends Marco and Luca.. Both from Italy. Both brothers and both hotel and night club owners..a story was to unfold regarding these two but I’ll reveal more a little later .. I’ll say no more.. Just two friendly brothers reeking of garlic and rancid ice cream, with I heart the mafia tattoos on each forehead
. Arrived
a Piraiba lodge In good time to a nice steak and rice lunch and a cold drink
from the freezer.. Luka helped me set up my rods as theirs had not arrived yet.
They were really sick as parrots at losing an afternoons fishing but I must say
they took it well..no murders or people gone missing so far.. Mind you plenty
of space to hide a body here.
Top tip.. Keep all your gear in your sight.
Had a few casts from the shore and shit myself when I
disturbed a caiman under a submerged Bush. If Marco and Luca had to “send the
boys round” they could always dispose of the corpse in the caiman.. but I managed my first peacock bass just in time
for Leonard to get the boat ready.
Persuaded Leonard my guide to take me fishing, in truth I couldn't wait and had a really
memorable afternoon catching 4 species.
I did manage to drop my pliers over the side and lose two expensive lures within the first hour. I must be out of practice.The tally was roughly, 12 Peacock bass, 4 bicuda, 4 piranha and a token stingray... Finished with a memorable peacock bass off an island.. Great start.. Weather looking dodgy so heading back.. Chicken an rice for tea.. Then bed at 7pm all cosy under a mosquito net.
I was awoken several times within the night by the sounds of
farting pooing, shitting and burping.. All in Italian.
The walls, if you can call them that in the lodge, are so
thin.. In fact just slats of wood between rooms, you have no privacy. Also,
they provided no insulation from noxious odours. I don’t know what they had been eating but it
smelt like something had crawled up their bums and died about a year ago.
28th Oct Monday
ALL ACTION WITH TARGET SPECIES
Up early and feeling positive. Breakfast of bacon eggs and
bakes. Was on the river for 6. 30.
Started off lure fishing for bait, however could only catch big peacocks..I said to Leonard.. Can’t you find me any little ones.. Cos I’m sick of catching these frigging big things.. Anyway there are worse problems to face and soon managed to get a few small species to use. Tried a few catfish spots but no luck.
Apparently according to a wise man I met in the Club
Baroomba in Georgetown, catfish go immediately to sleep when they hear an
outboard motor.
He also told me he was the son of a Nigerian king and had 42 million Guyana Dollars that he needed a bank account to receive.
I declined my bank details, as 42 million Guyana equates to about £ 1.50.
When he tried to introduce me to his daughter who was 55 I made my excuses and exited.
Mind you she did have nice tits.
Had a take whilst casting lures from a new spot which turned
out to be an Arowana.. One of my target species... Lost this one and about 7
others before I got a smaller one to the boat.
Had lunch. Chicken and pasta..
Then carried on catching a few more peacocks, hooked a large arowana that made
off with my frog coloured skitter pop. 2pm til 4pm was very slow... Sun hot..
Went for a swim off a little island.. Got sunburnt, regurgitated chicken pasta all down my front.
Found new catfish spot and had action straight away..which
proves Mr Club Baroomba wrong. These Nigerian princes are right liars, followed by more action with one piranha and two
redtails.
By the way a redtail is a species of catfish.. Not an affliction you may pick up from an evening spent in the Club Baroomba 62 Queen Victoria St Georgetown Guyana..... Honest.
Moved on to fish for peacocks.. Caught a really big one.. I
think my biggest ever.. And then had a smash take from a big Arowana.. Landed
this one as it was well hooked.. And finished off with a few nice peacocks..
Chicken and rice for tea..I forsee further regurgitation and another new shirt and even possibly a wash.
Changed a few hooks
and had an early night.. Slept like a log for 9 hours... Jungle sleep is the best thing ever.
The eggs we had for breakfast
must have been working on Mario and Luigi because both were silent... Egg bound
probably.
30th October Tuesday
THE BAD GOOD DAY
Woke up early to the sounds of Italian bum music. Obviously
not the eggs then. Got up.. Showered and had breakfast, which was in fact.. More
eggs. . The others took our boat today as they were going after arapaima. The
boat we were left with would not start.
·
Leonard attempted to fix it by taking the plugs
out with a hammer and chisel.
. I mentioned that if he slipped and cracked the cylinder head it would be all over for that whole engine.
. Leonard tells me to man up... This is the jungle and you don't find plug spanners under a Bush, you have to make do with proper tools like hammers and axes and rocks.
. He actually managed to say all this whilst playing candy crush on his Sansung S8.
Anyway, we tried everything. The time was now 7.30.am
Fitted new engine... That wouldn’t work.. Now 8.30 am.
The ladies had took a boat earlier to go to an island 5 miles downstream to make a satellite phone call so we decided to wait for them and use that boat.
8.30 to
9.00.waited for girls to come back. 9. 30..went out using their boat.. It broke down.
So we fished a few local spots caught a traira,a few peacocks
and an arowana.. losing four or five arowana. Sun was now baking hot.. So
headed back to lodge for a couple of hours to relax in the sunshine whilst
Leonard fixed or attempted to fix the outboard with a hammer a broken knife and
a rusty 14 mil spanner.
I was starting to get the beginning of a headache so wasn’t
too bothered at the break in fishing so I took some pain killers and relaxed a bit in a hammock listening to the birds and noises of outboard engines being ruined.
Kept thinking of the stupid joke about why Macaws never get
headaches in the jungle...
Cos the parrots et em all.
Spent the majority of the afternoon in the hammock. Trying to remember stupid jokes,listening to jungle sounds.. Accented with Italian farting five miles
downriver.
Had arranged go out a little later in afternoon so there was always still chance of a fish. To be honest I had written today off as a bit of a non event.. Not a failure by any means, but just not such a good day.
Must have dropped off til about 3pm and was awoke to the
sound of an engine... Working.
Set off fishing first for small stuff, of which we had a few, mostly peacocks.. Tried to concentrate
on the catfish..
As dusk dropped we anchored up by a big rock and set the baits down
about 40 yards out. As we waited for events to unfold we amused our selves by
being dinner for the insects.
Whilst Leonard tended to the catfish rods I wondered to the back of the rock to cast a top water lure about for peacock bass. I was rewarded with two explosive top water takes leading to two superb bass both taken in less than twelve inches of water and both very big.. In fact they turned out to be two of the biggest of the trip and both fought like demons in the fading light.
Unfortunately David Bailey(Leonard) couldn’t work the
camera.. So no shots.
I returned to the catfish baits we had placed earlier when
it got too dark to fish.
I lay down with my back against the warm rock, staring up at
the stars, whilst at the same time providing the local ants with supper... Me.
At about quarter past six the reel went off.. I was
connected to a large fish for 3 minutes or so until it got off.
We tried again placing the bait on the same spot..more ant
bites and aerial bombardments from
night wasps later, the reel screamed off.. I was connected.. After a long and
tiring fight I landed my first piraiba.. About 50 to 60 pounds.
As this was one of my target species I was elated..
Don’t know what was worse trying to land the fish or trying
to avoid being eaten by flies and stung by wasps whist trying to do so.
So it turned out to be a good day after all.
This, says Leonard, is a “bad good day. “
We drove the boat back in the dark, me staring at the skies
filled with contentment.
Ate a modest supper of chicken rice and soggy chips, not sure how
the trip could improve.
Wed October 31st
The Good Bad Day.
Woke this morning with an open mind...and open bowels. Left
at seven a little sore, ant bites and loose stools not a good combination.
I mentioned to Leonard about the loose stools.. He said you
fix that with a screwdriver.I have heard of this method being used in extreme cases of constipation, but never the other way.
Heard the joke about the constipated bank clerk??
She worked it out with a pencil!!
Peacocks were a little slow and only one sunfish as bait
although I lost a massive bicuda. I had placed a top water bait inches behind a rock,the bicuda took on the drop and jumped right away doing the usual bicuda trick of
getting rid of the hooks at the same time. Bugger.
A point worth noting regarding bicuda is that they are not a particularly hard fish to get to take your lure and like some girls I met in the Club Baroomba, are very accommodating, but as their mouths are almost all bone it’s hard to get the hooks to stick.. So.. A hooked to landed ratio of about one out of five is about right.
Moved to catfish spot at about 8 am and dropped bait.
What follows I can only describe as the most intense battle with a freshwater fish in my life.
Line ticked off the
reel slowly, I struck and was attached to a very heavy fish.. Possibly a jau or lau.. Fought the fish in a tug of war over an hour. Back breaking
work, gaining a foot losing two.. At one
point I was convinced it was just not going to come up and thought I was
wrapped round a rock.. Leonard tugged and pulled in the line a bit then assured
me it was not a rock, just a bloody big fish!! I resisted the urge to ask Leonard to spell me.. But I did the lot on my
own.This fish knocked the shit out of me.
I would time and time again,get six to eight feet of line on the
reel only for it to be taken back by the fish.
Finally I got it to
the surface and the first thing I saw was this huge tail.. Fish was massive.. I was knackered.
I think if you ever get attached to a fish as big as this..not attached romantically I mean.. I mean on the end of your rod.. I mean pulling your string.. Oh form your own opinion.. Remember although this fish weighed 25 kg more than I did. We humans still have the edge on stamina.
Providing the hook hold is good the tackle is sound and the knots hold and you are in a relatively snag free area.. You should always win. That’s a lot of providing though.
Fished for some Arowana and managed a few.. Actually 2 small
ones and four from anteater rock.. Back to lodge.. Knackered.
Suggested in the afternoon we try for a big. Bicuda... First fish landed.. A big bicuda. So just went through the motions of fishing for next few hours then back for curry chicken and rice.. Can you see a pattern occurring menu wise?..chicken was that tough it was still alive after being cooked for 3 hours followed by cheese.
Leonard told me that cheese gives him nightmares.. I told him that I was from the the North East of England and was not scared of a bit of cheese.
Thurs 1st November
MORE NEW TARGET SPECIES
Really early start this morning.. 6.15am.. Caught some bait
and started to fish for catfish.. First take of the day was my target species.
A leopard catfish or jundia. A really pretty catfish and one that is supposed
to be excellent to eat.
Found an enclosed lagoon which seemed full of them.
I thought.. Right I am putting on my bestest lure.. A 7cm
Crystal minnow in pure white.. Had to order it from Poland, took 5 weeks to
arrive and cost me sixteen pounds. First cast.. Massive bicuda took it.. Jumped
and snapped me off.. Its probably going to flog that lure to its mates down the
fishy pub later on.
I caught about Twenty peacocks here.
This spot was called a”pond “by the locals.
Really it’s a Sort of a backwater type lagoon. Saw two
Arapaima in here but neither of them would take bait offered.
Started journey back downriver,
Passed anteater rock and caught 1 arowana and missed
several.Then On to a new catfish spot and two different casts yielded 2 retails. One baby
size one sort of teenage size
Tried anther spot and caught a payara on the catfish rod..
Sadly this was the last fish of the day. Went in early.. 5.30pm
At the table, Marco spread guava jam on bread,only some daft
sod had put chilli sauce in the jar instead and gave poor Marco a hot surprise.
He said his arse would be sore for the rest of the trip now.. I said yes like a
Japanese flag.. There was a few seconds of comprehension then roars of
laughter..which went on for ages.
They named them selves team it alia but adopted the Japanese
flag as motto.
Conversation turned to the finding of King Richard the thirds skellinton, in a Car park.... I told them it was all a load of tosh as car parks were not invented at that time in history so he couldn't have been buried in one.
Turns out that Marco and Luka are the two owners of the
Italian Papeete beach resort on the Adriatic coast. Not managers or execs.. THE
OWNERS.
When the photos came out.. Well on the phone anyway.. God..
The women.. All goddesses.. And as Marco said its good to be the king!
He went on to elaborate in some detail, and his stories were most uplifting.. If you know what I mean.
I am not sure how big their business is, but when you start
referring to your company as a brand... Well you get my drift.. Also.. I think
there were other connections.I can’t ta saya no mora or dey will maka me an
offer I can’t ta refuse..
On that subject from what I gather a certain shall I say
family/brother hood/Sicilian crime
syndicate are/ not as despised as you may think.. You pay money each month to
them, And not so much more than rates or income tax.. And you can carry on your
business risk free.. That is if anyone causes you a problem in any way.. Starting
with belligerent customers or traders to threats of violence. They a da maka
dem go away.
Friday 2nd November
THE RUSSIAN THREAT.
Up until now we had had the lodge and river to ourselves,
however Sat afternoon was to see the arrival of a party of nine Russians. In
fact they had already started to bring bottles of rum up from basecamp
accompanied by slabs and slabs of beer.
As a team the brothers and I got on very well, prefering not
to drink, we went to bed early.. And
apart from the farting and shitting noises.. Well.. We were reasonably well
behaved. I think things were set to change.
The fishing continued to be excellent all day with me
catching the most species in any one day so far on the trip. List is as
follows, black tail characin,two types of peacock bass, Triaira, sunfish,
redtail cat, Bicuda, Arowana and stingray.
A real mixed bag, finished off with a massive forty kg
retail . Which is my biggest ever including those from Thailand.
No sniggering please.. This is a family show and we need not
mention my massive redtail again.
When I went to unhook this fish. It just fell out in my
hands.. The hook I mean.. Not my redtail.. Lucky or what.
On a note regarding hooks.. On this trip I spent quite a bit of money on hooks of varying
quality.
It became apparent that even the upgraded owners that I
fitted to lures were not up to the job. Same with Chinese split rings and
Swivels and snaps.
In fact the only trebles that I will now recommend are
Decoy.. And yes they are hideously expensive(for hooks) but I believe the time
I would have saved in changing the hooks and rings would have offset the price
of the better hooks and hardware.
Top tips..
Buy the very best you can, it’s worth it. Hooks in relation
to holidays are relatively cheap and it is not a place to save money.
Regarding saving money... I met this wise wise man in the
Club Baroomba in Georgetown.. He said he could get me a real good gobble for
fifteen pounds.. But as I’d already had my tea I told him that I’d take him up
on it another time.
And he was a bit old for me..
SAT 3RD NOVEMBER
THE RUSSIAN INVASION.
Last night I packed some of my gear away, it was sad to be
on the last full day of fishing and cut short by a few ours because our bags
had to loaded onto another boat for road transport at 4pm.
Early starts again and set off in search of mixed species,
downriver this time.
We discovered a “pond”on our way down and after an Amazon
Queen type escapade we arrived at an enclosed water with plenty of small fish
caught a dogfish and several peacocks. Lost many a bicuda.
Travelled down and fished a spot locally known as marcella
falls. This resulted in a few lost chances and two redtail catfish. No jau.
Time to head back up after catching an absolute cracker of
an Arowana from about six inches of water next to a rock... Well worth the trip
alone.
On the way back we stopped to help the supply boat going
up.. It had run out of petrol.. So it was sucking and spitting for ten minutes before we could move on. it was almost
like being back in Thailand.
Caught more fish..
Mostly peacocks all the way back to camp then it was time to finish fishing.
I was greeted on return by a rabble of not Russians but
mostly Polish,loud belligerent and most in semi states of inebriation.
The organiser of the party was by far the most big headed
arrogant man I had met in ages.. Such a change from Marco and Luca who were
gentlemen despite the farting, shitting and food theft.
I had also lost my private room, I had to share now, but this
was only for one night and the chap was the
best of the bunch.. A Norwegian.. So I got chance to practise my
Norwegian language skills in him.. He was not impressed as you can imagine.
The polish party behaved terribly during the evening all
getting very very drunk shouting singing and banging doors until the early
hours.
The sight of one older man.. In his late sixties staggering
about making a complete fool of himself
in a bad way made me think that my poor dad worked everyday of his life in a
crappy job and never got to see a place like this let alone fish one.. And guys
like him just wanted to come here to drink!!!! A thing they could do at home
every night should they wish.
And when the shitting started it was almost too much to bear.. I think from
some of the noises many of them had serious problems.
The other party were keen to get up early and get fishing so
I think they were being nice by farting and shouting... Some puking and
shitting.. At 4am. They were ensuring that we needed not put excessive wear on
our alarm clocks.
They were soon gone.. And we bade goodbye to the camp and
set off downstream wishing we were fishing.The residential caiman giving us the
two fingers whilst growling “ta taa and thanks for all the fish”.
A long wait ensued for our return plane, but there were cold
drinks a hammock and lots of sheep about so no need to get bored and we were
soon off on a pan Guyana trip home, stopping at every airfield on the way to
pick up everything from bags of nails to jars of jam.
Last stop was Mahia.. I think.. Airport.. Airport in the
loosest of loose terms.. In fact looser than Lorna loose let loose with a noose
on a moose in a hoose full of loose women.. All this on national not tight
week.
Got a drink and an eyeful of a Guyana woman bathing in a
puddle.. Apparently mud is good for the skin.. Think I’ll stick to oil of ulay.
Back to Georgetown and civilisation.. Well pizza shops at
least.. So I had one.. With extra cheese..pizza lady looked like a cross
between Diana Ross and Barry Gibb.. Pizza was a tragedy, grease was the word,woke up in the night with
a Saturday night fever, etc etc.
Thus ended my time.. Second time that is.. In Guyana.. I’m
glad I didn’t give up on it because this
time it was great..
