Western Australia

West Australia.

Having a brother and sister in law plus several friends living in various parts of Western Australia I have had many opportunities to sample what it has to offer both as a holiday destination and more importantly a fishing destination. 

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As a general rule, regarding shore fishing, the metropolitan regions are over fished and although will often throw up a big one every now and then, they require a certain hardcore local knowledge

Saying that lots of fun can be had with small species from almost every jetty Bridge sandy beach or rock. 

A point worth mentioning is the amount of tiny puffer fish in the town areas. Literally millions of them, known by locals as blowies, these can infest an area and strip your bait from your hook then bite clean through your hook before any other species get a look in. 

Often many families will come after work or on a weekend, bring an esky (cool box) a few drinks and sandwiches and have a lovely time together and if lucky enough to catch,  possibly barbecue it on the council provided barbecues dotted around the beach areas.

Most serious Australian fishermen will have a boat of some sort, be it a small aluminium one usually referred to as a tinny, up to the sky’s the limit, and this is the gateway to much better quality sport.

I will be mostly talking about ocean fishing on this blog as the freshwater scene in West Australia is very localised and select.

Its not impossible but if I have time I will cover what I have done a little later

In my honest opinion as far as shore fishing is concerned you have to get off the beaten track, by that I mean well away from metropolitan areas often several hundred km north or south.

Every time I have made this effort it has been worth it both in terms of fish caught and experiences had. The distances are often long but if you enter into the spirit of adventure can be great fun.

The roads are straight, long and often desolate.. Sometime  you may not see another car for hours on end and the only sources of fuel are the road houses, usually about 400 km apart. It is essential to refuel at these and make sure you have sufficient water and food for at least 48 hours.

You will not often see hotels or motels outside city areas, however you may see some campsites, which vary in quality.. I say no more.

I have had the misfortune to break down 3 times on the great North highway.

The  first two times on the same trip.

We were about 4 hours north of Perth when there was a bang from the rear of the car.

Tyre had blown, we had a spare but when we tried to jack the car up the jack sized at one spot and would not get the wheel off the ground.

We had to dig the earth out from under the wheel with two desert spoons, taking an hour in the hot sun with a million flies using you for a landing practise. 

A further hour north and another knock from the rear..

The tyre we had just put on had come loose and three wheel nuts had come off.. The wheel only just hanging on by the last few threads of the last nut.

Now what!!!

If we tried to go on with just one nut likely a bump or corner would shear off the wheel bolt and that would be it.

We sat and sat.. Several cars passed but no one had any spare wheel nuts..

The great North highway is littered with dead and abandoned cars along the way and out of the corner of my eye I spied one about three quarters of a mile ahead.. I had an idea.. My brother and I walked to the wreck and took the wheel nuts off it and tried them on our car..... They fit perfectly.. In fact I think they stayed with the car until it was, sold two years later

With a little hindsight we could simply have taken a single nut from each existing wheel and ran with 3 3 3 4 on each wheel, which would have been OK as a temporary measure. 

The journey onto shark Bay proceeded without further hitch. 

The other time was my fault when I foolishly didn’t refuel at Denham because of the price  and tried to make the roadhouse 109 km east.. We ran out 6 miles from the roadhouse but were picked up by a good Samaritan, taken to the fuel station and brought back to our car.. We were lucky. 

Speaking of luck. Below is an anecdote you may find amusing. 

The Curious Tale Of The Bart Simpson Boxer Shorts. 

I usually visit Australia in March or April and the preceding Christmas, as a gift, I was given a pair of Maroon/dark red cotton boxer shorts:  on the front of these was Bart  pulling a moonie and grinning. 

So what! you may say.. Well what indeed.. Looking back, I am convinced these had been, by a convoluted process of shop returns and re gifting, bestowed on me indirectly by the very devil himself.

The first time I wore them I think was for work in early January.. I set off as normal only to be hit by another car. The driver of said car was uninsured and to cut a long story short I had to repair the car myself. 

The next time I wore them I got stuck in a traffic jam on the A19 for four and a half hours. 

The next time I was cleaning out and refilling the garden pond only to become distracted and leave the hose on... For 3 days... 

It occurred to me the common denominator in all all these situations was the shorts.. Everytime I had worn them bad luck had hit me.. Which was bad luck as I only had one other pair of undies.... Only kidding I have two extra pairs. 

The shorts were relegated to the back of the sock drawer never to be seen again.. At that moment I really should have burned them, destroyed them, buried them in a lead box and had priests conduct religious cleansing rituals on them... But I didn’t. 

When it came to pack for Australia guess who I found whilst looking for smalls to pack... How could I be so stupid to believe bad luck was the result of Bart Simpson knickers.. How childishly foolish.. How could a pair of underpants have direct influence on my day to day life. 

Into the suitcase they did go.. On one shoulder the angel was saying, don’t be daft.. There only a pair of shorts.. On the other shoulder  Lucifer himself was in fits of laughter. 

Avoided wearing them in Australia until I had to: We were due to leave for shark bay the next day and went to the shops for some groceries.. I went to pay.. No wallet.. Panic stations...phoned the house. The brothers wife searched everywhere.. searched everywhere.. No wallet.. On the way back car radiator burst. Steam and water everywhere.. Got car to garage  on route home and it needed a new radiator $350AUD. OK.. It was money we had but loathe to part with.. Radiator would be here in an hour.. After 2 hours radiator arrived.. The wrong one...the mechanic was apologetic.. Phoned supplier, guess what? no radiators available for that car till next week.. Radiator would have to be repaired but that would take 3 days. 

I went into the toilet.. I stripped off the shorts.. Bart grinning at me.. I deposited them in an old drum three quarters full of waste engine oil.. As they sunk out of site the phone in the garage rang... Its the supplier.. He’s found a radiator do we want it...??? 

It was in and fitted in half an hour and the garage did it at cost because of all the messing about.. When I got back I went to put on fresh undies... Well actually they were yesterday’s still on my bedroom floor together with the jeans I had worn last night. On shaking them free my wallet dropped out.. 

To this day I have never worn or bought any of  The Simpsons merchandise.. I will not watch The Simpsons..if its on in  someone’s house or a trailer comes on for a forthcoming show.. I get anxious.. 

As for the garage I presume they must have got rid of the old oil quickly as I believe its still standing and in business.. However I would not be surprised if it(the waste oil, not the garage) had been buried in landfill and the site had been declared a danger zone after many of it’s employees had unexplained accidents. Or, the oil having been burned, the Ash dissipated into the atmosphere to rain down misfortune in particles of demonic fallout on the whole of Australia 

Anyway I digress. 

The town of Denham and Monkey Mia at the Western tip of shark Bay are great places for a short stay. 

There are campsites and chalets to rent, fuel, 2 supermarkets a restaurant and fish and chip shop, a visitor centre and a pub. 

Monkey Mia is famous for its dolphins, which you can swim with right on the beach and feed by hand whilst getting an education of their habits at the on site visitor centre. 

Camping and chalets are available at Monkey Mia. 

The shore fishing here is fantastic.

A deep channel runs along the beach and all sorts of tropical and subtropical species use this as a superhighway.

A strong rod, at least 80lb braid, a 3 oz lead, wire trace and 5/ 0 hook are all you need.

Baited with any small fish, cast out and wait... Even in the heat of the day you will get blistering runs from shovel nose sharks and stingrays. 

Best time is after 5 o’clock as the sun is setting cast your rods out, sit on the beach and wait.. 

Often you can sit from 5pm to 1 or 2 in the morning catching roughly one fish per hour on average  the sharks run about 30 lbs and are super fast and give terrific sport, while the rays, often up to 100 lb plus, give the dogged fight you would expect from dustbin lids with fins. 

Other species such as bluefish  known as tailor in Australia, trevally, lizard fish, mulloway, Spanish mackerel, gars, pink and Queen snapper and several species of cod.. By cod I mean grouper not Atlantic cod. These and many more will sometimes take a look at your baits.

Set up is usually two strong rods with baitrunner type reels, 80lb braid, a minimum of ten feet 150lb mono rubbing leader, lead, wire trace and 5/0 or 6/0 hook. 

Catch any small fish with a bit of prawn and cast this out. Whole if fishing for Ray and shark, cut for other fish,sit back, look up at the stars and wait for the reel to play its music. 

If sport is slows down a little, turn off all lights and soon thousands of tiny crabs in all colours will emerge from the sand and nibble your toes.. Cute.. But irritating after a while. 

Another option during the day is to beach walk and spot fish on  the move, and cast to them, the Americans call this sight fishing and its great fun. Casting to black shapes in the surf is explosive stuff, and in the shallow water of the flats the fish can’t go down and so tear off at a searing pace often jumping, making rooster tails of spray.

I once did this type of fishing on caprice, without a hat or water and ended up in a sorry state, severe sun burn and dehydration.

I had a headache that lasted for days and really spoilt a chunk of my hard earned holiday.

So, make sure you have a hat and some drinking water and slip slap slop as they say.

Something else to try is to take a day’s charter from Denham. 

These run almost daily in season and weekends off season. 

For about 100 dollars per person you will be taken to some of the best fishing Western Australia has to offer. 

Expect to catch, bluebone, baldchin grouper, (pronounced groper in Australia) pink snapper, Queen snapper, emperor, dhufish, cod, and many other species whilst bottom fishing. On the troll don’t be surprised if Spanish mackerel, tuna, bonito, cobia, Mahi Mahi, sailfish etc etc, take your lures. 

Plus as many sharks as you want to catch.

You usually end up doing a combination of both about 30 percent trolling, 70 percent bottom fishing. 

I would thoroughly recommend taking a charter. 

I would not thoroughly recommend the camp sites, I believe they have been refurbished since I was last there but from what I can remember were insect ridden shit holes. 

Went for a shower once in the shower block. There were three cockroaches in the shower tray defending their territory.. I tried hitting them with a boot, stick, a rock, two rocks... They were real tough

 guys.. Ended up cracking the shower tray trying to squash them.. Which I didn’t.. They then disappeared down the crack giving me the two fingers. 

Avoid March and April as wind and flies are a nightmare. 

Fishing tackle and bait are available everywhere on site and so are freezer facilities should you need them. 

Shark Bay is a very beautiful place in its own right and has many tourist attractions such as shell beach, Eagle bluff and the shark reserve.. Or you could try to spot a quoll.. A small marsupial.. Or simply just avoid the snakes spiders and feral cats. 

Lure fishing is very popular and can be very productive from the beaches piers and docks.. A shallow diving lure will get you tailor, trevally snapper and several small shark species which are dynamite on the lure rod.

A note on sharks while bathing..

If you are afraid of sharks don’t bathe Alone. At dawn or dusk. Don’t bathe in murky water and don’t bathe anywhere near to fish gutting stations.

Shark is often sold as generic fish in your fish and chips.. Ie, if you go to a chip shop and ask for fish and chips you will get shark. 

If you want any other fish you have to ask for it by name. 

My brothers mantra toward being attacked by sharks is.. :”don’t eat them and they won’t eat you”

So be sure to order snapper and chips as opposed to fish. 

 In the metro areas of Perth you are most likely to encounter white sharks. These prefer the slightly cooler waters of the south. Once you cross the tropic of capricorn you are most likely to encounter tiger sharks and bull sharks. 

Further north the sharks are less as they have mostly been eaten by the saltwater crocodiles. 

It is quite trendy today to be a shark vigilante but please beware sharks are a real problem in this area and many locals will have known someone who has been either lost to, or damaged by, a shark. 

I love sharks but I would not necessarily try to convince a local that they are harmless. 

North of the tropics the freshwater fishing starts to become viable with the estuaries providing barramundi, mangrove Jack, thread fin salmon and barracuda, plus many bull sharks. further up you can lure fish for barramundi, saratoga, bream, and catfish,some times catching exotics too like archer fish and Australian bass. 

South of Perth in the Pemberton region there are trout fisheries and at the right time of year can provide excellent fly and spin fishing for brown and rainbow trout. Redfin perch are always about and eager to take a spinner or small lure and thrive in the many rivers and impoundments of South Western Australia. 

That just about brings to a close this chapter on West Australia.. It is a massive place and I know I have not really scratched the surface but if you are visiting relatives, attending a wedding, backpacking or just going through a midlife crisis, don’t forget your fishing gear.. Its well worth the effort. 

A final shot of the sunset to finish off

Oh and one of a 100lb plus shovel nose. 

Nile Perch in Lake Nasser Egypt.

Eygypt was my first ever serious forage into destination angling and looking back I don't know how I survived it.. I was in my thirties already overweight and hopelessly naive about this this type of thing. 

The ideas stemmed from daydreams I had as a child, like many of us, looking through the eagerly awaited free copy of Abu 's Tight Lines.. Released every year. 

In the front of the magazine.. There was usually a short blog,if that word was even invented then, involving a party of derring do Swedish anglers armed to the teeth with Abu' s latest tackle on a quest to subdue some of the world's greatest fish. One such article was the trip to Lake Victoria and Murchison Falls,probably circa early 1970's.   This stayed with me for over thirty years... such is the power fishing can have over one. 

 Fast forward  thirty year's or so and several extra pounds in weight.

 After many phone calls faxes etc I was booked on a trip with The African Angler, to Lake Nasser, the current mecca for Nile Perch.  Nasser had been created in the seventies when the Nile was Dammed at Aswan, this created a massive lake stretching all the way down to the Sudan. The indigenous fish already in the Nile at that point thrived and grew in great size and numbers. 

Sadly Lake Victoria, through poor management had become a thin shadow of its former self and was no longer a viable prospect for nile Perch. 

The Amount of information on tackle and lures was limited and the outfitter was more concerned that his trip was oversold rather than helping with the specifics of things, like lure types colour's,, rods reels leaders etc. only saying bring this lure, that lure lots of line, tips for the guides.. Etc. 

I was paired with a Welsh man who had fished Lake Nasser several times and I don't think he was too keen to have a greenhorn with him. 

The whole ten days was like cutting new teeth,he had hardly any sense of humour and was miserable as sin.. 

The guide.. Muhammad.. Was even worse..  He seemed to resent the fact he would have to work! He was very rude at times, abrupt and moody. 

He took us out the contracted eight hours a day.. No more.. No less... 

Day 1

As we reached our first prospective spot I was so excited I could hardly tie my knots and as the lure disappeared behind the boat I expected it to be gobbled down before it had started to troll. Sadly I was to be disappointed.. Trolling all day at several spots for 8 eight hours gave is nothing. 

Back to camp.. Camp being a house boat the staff lived on and where we ate. We slept in bunks on our own boats.. So there was no getting away from my partner at all.

Apparently I can snore for England.... What a shame.. 

Some of the other boats on the party had caught fish in the fifty to sixty pound mark but not in any numbers,so the fish were definitely there. 

Day 2

Same as day 1 except for a couple of suicidal baby nile Perch unceremoniously dragged in on hopelessly over gunned tackle by my boat partner on a perch coloured Rapala Super Shad. 

I may have been naive, unattractive and a soft touch for a bit of skirt, but I am not a stupid angler and noticed that other catches were made on the same lure type and particularly colour. A perch patterned rapala super shad. 

I had a shad rap.. Two in fact.. One gold and one silver.. I had been using them all day.. Not a sniff. 

My partner had the perch flavour and both fish fell to this lure. 

I had experienced fish showing a preference for colour several times previously. When fly fishing it is not unusual for trout to want one particular colour on any given day.I reasoned that the nile perch, whilst obviously there, we're not ravenous and being a little picky,or more likely preoccupied on a certain type of prey fish. 

Back to camp.. Sleeping in the desert under the stars is a beautiful way to spend a night and I can honestly say I enjoyed every night's sleep immensely.. I was beginning to love the desert..and although I had not caught anything yet I was working hard trying to figure out what the fish wanted. 

Day 3

I figured out what what the fish wanted.. It was a shad rap in perch colour... NOTHING ELSE.

I tried blue, silver, firetiger, red head, yellow.. Nothing.. Other anglers lent me other colours to try.. No one would lend me a perch pattern.. There were now only four of these lures on the lake and were locked away in a safe at night with armed guards surrounding them.the owners of these lures unspeakably smug.. As they were beginning to catch fish and some good ones too. 

My boat partner had three  fish today to about 40 lbs.. I watched on with puppy dog eyes. 

Day 4

Ssme scenario as day three, 4 fish for my partner.. None for me.. I was hoping he would let me use  his lure for an hour or two to maybe break my blank but he didn't. You can learn to hate a person quickly.. Particularly if he's Welsh. Must be the desert sun. 

The other boats all catching fish. The biggest today was 80 lb. 

One highlight was during the day we pulled up to some rocks and were told to fish from the shore while our surly guide summoned Allah. .. I enjoyed this, catching juvenile nile Perch, tilapia and tiger fish on a mepps spinner.. It was great fun.. Felt rejuvenation. Went for a desert poo, tried to avoid getting stung by scorpions up bum. 

Day 5 

A small 3 lb nile Perch took my silver shad rap.. I skull dragged it in on 50 lb line and semi congradulated myself. 

It was my only perch caught from the boat whilst trolling on the whole trip. 

I insisted we shore fished a bit today.. Much to my partners disdain and  I had a fun time with the smaller species.. Being broken off twice by large nile perch and losing a cracking tiger fish... The downside.. I only brought 3 mepps lures as an afterthought  and was down to my last one. 

Day six

Tried dead bait from the shore.. Horrible way to fish, but hooked a nile Perch of about thirty pounds which shredded my line on a rock and left me shaking my head on the shore wondering what I was doing wrong. 

At lunch time today I amused myself by looking for snakes and scorpion s in the hope that I would get bitten, die and be relieved of the misery of watching everyone else catch.. 

I couldn't find a snake and lifted loads of rocks up and saw tons of scorpions but none of them attacked me, they just ran under the nearest vacant rock. 

The locals were convinced I was mad.. Or stupid or both. 

Last Day

NO fish. 

Apart from the odd small fish or two ALL the notable nile perch had come out on the perch pattern shad rap. For me bad luck, others with the right lure had totally different trips and caught fish every day.... Now I know what your saying.. I was blaming my poor angling skills on not having the right lure. You may be right but would have been have to be there to see first hand.. That perch shad rap was dynamite. 

The voyage back was uneventful and apart from the fact that when I returned to civilisation, my body irrevently reminded me that i had not seen a woman in almost two weeks.. I was amazed that my already low standards could drop even further. 

An half decent pizza in the  Aswan Moon  restaurant preceded a quite run of the mill airport expierience. Glad to get home.i vowed never to return to Lake Nasser again... 

By the end of the week I  was looking at ways to get back to Lake Nasser again.. I know.. What can I say.. I am weak... So it was arranged to revisit the following November.

There are many advantages as I have said in my previous blogs about going back to a previous destination.. You have the benefits of expierience gained on your first trip plus the added ability to call the  trip company out first hand if he says its always brilliant. 

Armed with no less than six perch flavoured shad raps and a bucket full of ideas.. I set out for my local airport for a connecting flight to Heathrow.. Then Heathrow to Cairo then onto the Lake. 

My thoughts were, as soon as the perch raps started to work I could sell the spare ones to my fellow anglers for one million dollars.. And make my fortune.. 

The flight was cancelled. 

I missed the Heathrow connection.. And all transit to the lake.. And so it starts I thought to myself.. There followed two days of agony before I got to Cairo then Luxor by bus. African Angler could not meet me  until the next day so I had a free day. I decided to do the Egypt stuff.Sphinx , Pyramids and Cleoptras special house for lonely men.... 

All the sights of Eygpt were a disappointment, except Cleopatra(real name Tracy) who although a bit on the old side, was fully functioning and still had some teeth. 

The sphinx and Pyraminds are a mess and in a shocking state.. In fact although the pyramids look smooth from a distance, the blocks making up their construction are clearly visible close up. 

Sat on one of these was a small Egyptian boy with a rock, smashing it on one of the building blocks trying to get to an Egyptian pound coin (20 uk pence) wedged in a crack..so much for heritage..

I then decided to take a camel ride round the pyramids. 

I agreed a price.. Paid.. Mounted camel and was silently lead on a sandy path round the back of the pyramids. 

Once round the back it was a different story. It was like bombed Beruit and littered with debris litter and shopping trollies etc.. I think it has been cleaned up now but in those days it was tragic. 

He asked me to dismount for a photo of me, a pyramid and an asda trolley, then told me he needed £20.00 or he was going to be shot tonight. I tried to shrug this off.. But he then went on like a maniac.. Accusing me of ending his life because I would not give him the cash.. He then became very aggressive and said he would have to leave me behind the pyramid to make my own was back as his camel was sick.. Fearful of being attacked or robbed walking back I am sad to say I bargained with him and he got a tenner.. Which was all I had... And I was free.. From him at least. 

Another similar experience happened in the taxi back home where I was taken to just about every rug shop, Egyptian tat shop and tailors in Cairo. I eventually got sick and threatened not to pay him if I didn't get straight back.. 

Day 1 

Was met at Aswan by my guide Hani, who was a lot more positive than the previous one and as I was late there was just me and him to the boat so no partners, no smell of leeks, or the incessant humming of the theme music from Ivor the Engine.. Great. Bonus. 

This meant we could fish two rods, one I put on the perch Shap rap the other on a rapala CD 22 in red head.. Twenty minutes into the troll the red head was taken and a 25 lb nile Perch landed.. What a great start. 

Soon to be followed by several more of a similar size.. I was elated.. And this only the first day. 

Day2

Lots of trolling and about  five or six fish up to around thirty pounds on every type of lure except the perch shad rap. 

Managed to get a nice one from the shore on a CD 18.

My guide could not have been more different than Muhammad.. He was really motivated and even had some sense of humour. 

Day 3

Early start.. Bathe in the lake.. Egyptian bread for breakfast.. Sun on legs.. Even a few fish... 

still nothing on the perch shad rap though.. Caught on rapala cds, Halco laser pros, depth raiders, manns stretch 30s reef diggers, I could go on.. Nothing over 50 lbs in weight though.

Great day.. Lovely weather plenty of fish.  

Day 4 

Fairly much of the same thing until around twelve when the left hand rod with a silver shad rap was taken... At first I thought it was a rock. But the rock shook its head and shot off at a rate of knots then jumped. 

A massive nile Perch.. After half an hour playing the fish it was finally landed and weighed at 108 lbs.. By far the biggest fish of the trip and up to that point the biggest freshwater fish I had ever caught. 

the fish was released and we headed back to the house boat catching a few small ones on the way.

Last day

Today I didn't really want to catch any more nile Perch but wanted to concentrate on getting a big tiger fish and have some fun with the small species.. This was a lot tougher than it was on my previous trip,but lady luck was with us and I managed two super tiger fish. 

this finished the trip off so well I decided not to fish again and finish on a high note.. Home tomorrow and back to work.

I'm really glad I went back for the second trip, I caught as many fish as I wanted to catch, had a great time with a great guide and although my trip was shortened by the initial problems with the airline,i do not feel I missed out on anything. 

As a footnote, Lake Nasser has now gone the way of Lake Victoria and is largely a poor prospect for large nile Perch. This is due to  poor fishery management and subsistence fishing by the locals. 

Funnily enough Lake Victoria has started to make a comeback due to better management and is now fishing well.. Hopefully Nasser will recover likewise.

Guyana 2019

Guyana October 2019
Sunday
It just occurred to me that a good time to start this blog is as it happens.. At the moment I’m sat in the departure lounge.. If it could be called that.. In Ogle Airport, Georgetown, Guyana awaiting my flight to Iwokrama airstrip.
It’s a curious place of coming and going.. Clocks do not exist and the concept of time is a loose one. .. Only a barrage of local commodity in the form of diverse items ranging from electrical cables through outboard motor parts to cases of eggs.
Its 8 am local time and already the shirt I’m wearing is stuck to my back and have droplets of sweat dropping onto my tablet screen.
Lots of people on phones being busy.. I’m the odd one out here.. Purely for pleasure.. Seems indulgent I know but no doubt I will face Guyanas domestic shortcomings soon enough.
A word worth mentioning here is Navin. My outfitter has been superb.Never late and always fully organised.
I was picked up late Friday night by his team and placed in a nice hotel by the sea, for a free day in Georgetown on Saturday.
A trip to Katieur falls did not materialise so I got acquainted with banks beer and was soon hilariously drunk.
I digress.

The 8.30am flight to Iwokrama airstrip will not be as punctual, So I settle myself into the local idiom.
The ladies here are in full makeup, Sunday dress and considering the heat and humidity have turned out looking quite presentable. Accompanied by many super well behaved children in brightly coloured day glow clothes and shoes, hair done in a selection of styles, each attempting to out do the next.
9.00 am... Dum de dum....
9.20 is a call to board.. Now this is strictly unheard of.. Only 45 minutes late!.. That’s on time!
Soon I was ushered out onto the blistering tarmac to the plane, where I was met by a couple of familiar faces... It was none other than Fiona Bruce and Eric Knowles from the antiques roadshow.. Yes.. I couldn’t believe it either.. They had come to put a rough value on the plane, which delayed departure a little.
I was informed the value was £100.00ukp.which I thought a little alarming as the pilot told me he had just put £200.00 worth of fuel in the tank..
Engine started after five attempts. This had a bizarre effect on the local wildlife.Whilst scaring the majority into oblivion, the local snakes came out in force to investigate all the strange rattling noises.. Maybe the plane was a parseltongue.. Who knows..
After a quick grope of Ms Bruces bottom it was time to board.
Soon we were off the ground heading to Iwokrama airstrip.
Upon landing all the wheels fell off the plane.
Only joking, but I’m sure they were only held on with bits of silver foil and sellotape.
Upon reaching the river it was evident that the water levels were higher than I expected, this did not bode well for the fishing.
I spent the majority of the boat journey setting up my rods.. Still seemed to take forever to reach the camp though.
The scenery is simply stunning,this being a mountainous region of the Amazon rainforest.
I was fishing by 12.30 and soon into peacock bass.. Had several.. Then decided to do a spot of catfishing.
Bait was taken within minutes and upon strike I was broken off.
After a swift re rig up we cast out again and the bait was picked up within ten minutes.. I struck and the rod snapped!!!!

After a little improvisation we landed the catfish.. My first ever jau and curiously enough it had my first trace in its mouth so it was the same fish that had just broken me off.
Managed a reasonable temporary repair on the rod.
As brief sideline I sometimes get people asking me why I inflict pain on fish.. Often in stronger terms than that, but here is an example of a fish clearly hooked in the mouth ten minutes ago.. The hook remaining in its mouth, actively feeding, as if nothing was wrong.
By this time the weather had turned threatening and we headed back to the lodge catching a few peacocks and piranhas on the way..
By the way it is not big or clever to fish in an electrical storm with carbon fishing rods.
By way of evening entertainment, well, the storm struck hard, so I spent a pleasant few hours wrapped up in a hammock listening to rain and jungle sounds. The lightning providing the visual effects.
Later sound effects were supplied by a snoring Russian.
Monday
Jet lag caught up with me at about 4 am. As such I was drinking coffee by headtorch, mooning around the camp and generally making a nuisance of myself by being noisy.
The Russian couple introduced themselves at breakfast(don’t mention Chernobyl, don’t mention Chernobyl.... Chernobyl..... Chernobyl).. As Mr and Mrs Chernobyl... No..Sergei and Ivannna Shitcztincz Very pleasant too they were for Russian types..April 26 1986, reactor 4, 1.30am.
They gave me stick about brexit so I replied that they gave Europe caesium 137.
Set off for fishing at 5.30am
I hoped I would be able to get a little fly fishing in and so I did..I had ummed and arred about taking the fly rod but ended up really enjoying it.
My homemade white flies catching peacock bass and 2 lovely big bicuda.

Species count was quite good today:
Jundia catfish (pronounced Jan gee arr)
Redtail catfish
stingray
Red, pacu
Peacock bass
Black tail characin
Leporinus
Aimara
Piranha
Arowana
Bicuda.
Quite pleased finished the day with a nice red tail. Not massive but good enough
No really big fish today. Managed to hook myself a few times though. My hands are already in such a mess.
About mid afternoon I develop a headache.. And a right stinker... Had to put up with it without pain relief till I got back to camp at 6pm.
The only time I forget to pack headache tablets.
Early night I think.. No rain today. Water levels dropping. Head minging.
Tuesday
4.22am.........BING!!!!!! I’m awake and ready to rock and roll... Only rock and roll does not exist in the Amazon.
The nearest you get is Bob Marley.
Guyana has a very Caribbean feel to it as opposed to Brazil.
I had a much better night, I was really tired yesterday so maybe I needed it.
5.30am start and we’re heading down steam today, after about an hour of unsuccessfully trying to get some bait we finally arrived at a “pond”.

If you have read my previous blog, I explained a “pond”is a local term for a body of river water that’s been trapped by a piece of low level land.
When the forest floods in the rainy season these a are Haven to fish and wildlife.
The pond was full of fish and we soon had bait and caught a new species to boot, a dogfish, a small pike characin.
Leonard noticed an arapaima in the pond we cast a bait to it and were soon hooked up.. After a strong and spectacular, though short, battle we landed the fish of about 80lbs.
It was stunning.. The condition of these wild fish are a cut above what you would get in Thailand.. Colours simply gorgeous.
Unfortunately Leonard is, amongst other things, no great photographer so I think the pics were taken from the wrong angle.

As care for the fish was paramount, I did not mess on.. Just a quick few pics and away he or she swam.
Arapaima are probably the one fish that every Amazon angler wants to catch, and many just visit for this reason alone.. I think they are overrated.
The trip further down brought us to a rock. Whilst standing on said rock I cast a top water bait to bicuda..I had a fantastic hour landing five or six and losing as many, it was an explosive top water strike every cast.
Rest of the morning was quiet except for a small sorubim.
I developed an attack of wind.. And in a small boat there is no hiding it. The aluminium Hull sort of acting as a sound amplifier.
I blamed it on the local monkeys.
Lunch was inedible.
Which may or may not have been monkey.
The way back up was hastened by us trying to outrun an electrical storm which we didn’t, and ended up drenched.
Every cloud has a silver lining, pardon the pun and this cooled everything down and put the fish back on the feed.
Had a massive peacock bass then stopped at the bicuda rock and caught about six more.
I had a stronger than normal strike which turned out to be a payara which I lost.
Caught a few more bicuda then hooked another payara which was landed... Yay.
Payara like many Amazon fish, have a mouth full of teeth and very hard maxillary. This means trying to get the hooks to penetrate can be an absolute nightmare. Six strikes to one landed is a realistic average.
Plague of massive biting flies today.. Hope I don’t swell up like Augustus Gloop.
Catfishing had been slow all day but in the last half hour ten minutes from the lodge I hooked a massive jau.
Hard to estimate but maybe 60 to 70 lb
Attached to this fishes gills was a candiru..

Got it to a beach, landed it successfully and headed off back to camp smiling.
Species count for the day:
Arapaima
Jau
Pacu
Payara
Peacock bass
Piranha
Dogfish
Sorobim
Bicuda
Haven’t counted the candiru as this came free with the jau.. By the way if you don’t know what a candiru is you had best Google it.
Individual species count now up to 16
At times a little hard work.. But turned out to be a really memorable day.
Wed
On the back of yesterday I was up early and eager to get going.
We travelled upstream in hope of trying to get a few more bicuda on the fly.. Checked in at the desired spot but couldn’t get one to take a fly.
I did manage to get an Arowana on a fly though which I was chuffed to bits with.

It was one of three Arowana caught today, the other two on skitter pops.
Cats were really slow today and the day was really hot.
Lunch was really bad too.
They could improve the flavour of the food by fifty percent just by adding salt and pepper.
You usually pick up your packed lunch first thing.. Ie 5.30 am and it’s usually some indiscriminate meat.. And rice.
This comes in a plastic tub wrapped in a black plastic bin liner type bag.
This is then left in 90 degree sun for at least 5 hours.
How I haven’t shit through the eye of a needle I’ll never know.. To be fair I’ve tried not to eat it but the cooking lady Rita is like Shorlock Hermes and examines the left over food tubs for uneaten scraps and if you ain’t ate up, there is much sucking of teeth and black looks.
In the final hour the day redeemed itself.
The line peeled of the reel and the fight was on with what would be the biggest catfish of the trip so far.
A jau of about sixty five plus pounds. Bigger than the one caught yesterday.

When I got back to the lodge I found out I had been breakfast lunch and tea to just about every carnivorous insect in the Amazon.
Some of these are persistent to the point of madness and big enough to make grown men cry.I am certain one particular bug that took a chunk out me had tattoos on its legs!!!!! I hate insects!
After several unsuccessful attempts at extermination, I gave up and subjected myself to the form of self abuse that was dinner.
Suitably unrefreshed, I retired.
Thursday,
After a relatively slow Wednesday I was not too looking forward to Thursday. I ended up sleeping late and it took me a while to get going.
Still fishing for ten past six though.
And by six thirty had found a pod of feeding bicuda, had twenty minutes of top water action. Almost a strike or two every cast.
This lifted my mood immediately.
Plenty of fish today, the biggest two being huge retail catfish, caught a couple of big peacocks, lost a few, and hooked what I thought was a catfish that turned out to be an electric eel.
I foolishly attempted to unhook this ugly monster only to get 600 volts up my left arm. Wow, did I Jump!!!
I can honestly saw I have never felt a shock like that.
It was however another new species.

So I have added today:
Electric eel
Sunfish
That brings the overall species count to 18
Also caught a nice sorubim catfish.
Spent a couple of hours at lunch time fishing for pacu. Now I have caught piripatinga pacu in Thailand and they pull hard, however,these red pacu live in fast water and are caught on spinners as opposed to bait and use the current to their full advantage.
Pound for pound I would say these are the strongest fish caught to date.
The first one I hooked broke me off.. The second turned downstream and poor Leonard had to swim after it..

By the third one I’d just about got the hang of them.. You just got to try to turn them straight away.. Real shit or bust stuff.
Then spent three quarters of an hour drifting downstream casting.. And caught loads of fish.. I really love this type of fishing as you just don’t know what will take the lure next.
I finished the day with a 40 lb plus retail which broke th

e rod again.
They had made me a special dinner this evening.... I had been dreading it all day and it did not disappoint.
It was chicken rice and peas.. A Caribbean staple.
The chicken must of had a bloody long neck... Like a frigging anaconda.. Just sections of chicken neck.. With rice and black eye peas..
I did a rearrangement of my plate Tracy Ermin would have been proud of and sulked off to my hammock.
Round about this time I was beginning to think of home.
FRIDAY
A change of plan today early start downstream back to the lodge for twelve, attempt at eating lunch, nanna nap then fish til about eight pm into the dark.
The fishing was starting to follow a bit of a8 routine by now, ie: catch bait, fish for catfish until bait ran out, then catch more bait.
The morning gave us two retails and an assortment of peacocks bicuda and piranhas.

At quarter to twelve the line screamed off the reel and a twenty minute tussle landed me another enormous jau.. The biggest of seven jau caught this trip.
A guestimate would be seventy pounds
I slept like baby in my hammock in the afternoon and awoke as zombies awake.
This had such an effect on my casting that Leonard was convinced that I was fishing for birds as I managed to snag my lure in every available tree and Bush in Amazonia.
We also had a few lost catfish and a few dropped runs.
At six pm the line screamed from the reel and I knew I was onto to a big one.
Knowing what to expect I was a little more savvy playing the fish.
Experience is always helpful, or so my wife keeps telling me, and after some tugging(by me) and some pulling (by the fish) an extremely big LauLau catfish was landed, well over one hundred pounds in weight.

Leonard said it was one fifty easy.. I said it wasn’t bloody easy and that I was getting to old for this.
I decided to call it a night as I was unlikely to best this fish today, so headed back to camp to brave dinner which could have been Cherubim and Seraphim for all I knew.
Today I have seen eagles, hawks, snakes, otter, spiders, mantises, crocs(caiman) and pirahnas and I’m more scared of Rita’s cooking.
It was a noisy night in camp tonight lots of goings on.. I was awoke at one am to the same song playing over and over again and a bizarre thumping noise,which curiously reminded me of the dufflepuds from C S Lewis’s Voyage of the Dawn Treader. Out of politeness I ignored this for half an hour until  l could stand it no longer.
There was a type of Dawn Treading going on,but not by dufflepuds.
Just two guides intoxicated on Eldorado five star Guyana rum.
So I joined in the dance..
It was noted.. I have da moves.
SATURDAY
To follow roughly the same format as yesterday we would go upriver instead of down.
As a precaution I told Rita I would cook my own lunch today.
This was taken with mixed reaction, however I insisted, and reached for a knife to press my point and eliminate further argument,and utilising leftover potatoes managed a passable Spanish omelette.
Morning fishing was mostly for catfish and added a new species to the list :
A Zemora.. Its a sort of Amazon equivalent to a pangasius type catfish, that’s the stuff sold in the shops as panga, It’s a midwater swimmer and predatory.

More importantly this took the species total to twenty.
The evening session gave up a massive pond peacock a black tail and  just as it was about to get dark finished off with a medium sized jau catfish. 
Dinner was beefsteak and potatoes... Don’t know how they managed to get that steak so tough.. After major surgery I converted one pound of beefsteak into one ounce of just chewable meat.
On the whole I was pleased with my choice as I was offered monkey!
I said I wouldn’t give one for either but this went over their heads.
Thankfully I was spared the sight of the dead and partly butchered monkey, which having seen one before is a bit too close to comfort.
Sunday
Last day
Feeling a bit down and lonely.
It’s okay doing this boys own stuff etc etc. But. I think I could have quite easily finished yesterday.
The fishometer is literally breaking the needle and I’m not sure I can do another day’s fishing.
I think when you travel on your own, when it comes to missing things you don’t just miss certain things like you would when you are away with someone. You miss everything..
Anyway its five thirty am... Fish o clock
Sticking to the seven centimeter yo zuri Crystal minnow I quickly managed to secure three peacocks in quick succession until a piranha bit it in two, and were soon headed off to a catfish spot.
This revealed two retails a baby one about five pounds and one about fifteen.
Subsequent spots yielded nothing other than sunburn. As I’d forgot my hat.. This is a major screw up out on the river all day.
Time to do some lure fishing and caught a bicuda, two peacocks and a surprise red pacu. Illustrating the fact that for me the seven cm minnow is the go to lure for Amazon fishing. The one I’m using at the moment Rachael bought me for Christmas.
Ate lunch... Two breakfast pancakes with peanut butter between....... Not bad.
Looking for a bathing spot I cast a spinner into a pool and had a Zemora take it.. I thought it was a payara but it didn’t jump.
This turned out to be excellent bait.
Found a sort of natural swimming pool and took time out for a swim and a good cool off.

The afternoon I spent chasing catfish:
Upon reading this I make no mention of fish hooked and lost and fish missed..
I would say that I missed a good fifty percent of catfish runs, by missing I mean failing to connect and would say that of all fish hooked at least fifty percent either threw the hook themselves or managed to snag me to the point where I could not retrieve them.

The substrate of the Essequibo river is littered with dead trees, bushes and rocks the size of cars.
Certain fish ran me through rocks and parted the line.. Others just went off at a hundred miles an hour and simply snapped the line.
A small but perfectly formed jau and a jundia or leopard catfish made a appearance followed by a small jau and another small red tail.
It was back to camp for a cold shower, a lukewarm cup of nescafe, and chicken portion.
I’m sure it was the same chicken portion I had the other day. I looked for scars as to where I had attempted to cut into it but only found partly cooked feathers.
Spent the rest of the evening fishing for crocodiles with a washing line and an old fish with a pop bottle as a float.
We got a biggie too.. About 250 pounds and really aggressive.. Maybe we should not have tried to pull him out of his environment naturale.

Monday
So the journey back must begin today.
Breakfast was served at six am in the form of a piece of cake. As cake I’d give it three out of ten. As an anchor it scored an easy ten.
After breakfast I was approached by Leonard and presented with a preserved piranha skull. It was one I’d caught last Monday that he had prepared  the traditional way by skinning, sun drying and salting.
Forgive my contemplative mood, its not that I will miss Guyana, or Rita’s cooking, it’s just I hate travelling.
At about now I am saying for the first time, I won’t be doing this again in a hurry and though I have had a wonderful time the journey home is awful.
The boat journey downstream put me in a pensive mood.
Even feeling pensive, I am feeling overall, somewhat refreshed in spirt.
My mind and body are calm and at peace and except for the half house brick that is residing in my stomach, things could be worse.
There is so much to the Amazon.
Not so much a river system more of a geological and biological concept where anything is and could be possible:
Seeing a flight of blue macaws, hooded eagles, attacks by killer insects, bat’s, crabs, (not from Rita), the threat of a candiru swimming up your private parts.
I remember feeling almost surreal in the fact that every new day would reveal wonders.
Always something new, sometimes good sometimes not so good. The one constant, being Rita’s culinary skills!
Next job on the list is to stop off at a local village, visit the shop and buy Rachael a bottle of rum.
In true Guyanese spirit this turned out to be no easy task, involving a Bush walk and trek through a swamp. Rum was purchased eventually.
I hope Rachael appreciates it as I tried my best to get this from the most remote location I could.
At the airstrip I was directed to the departure lounge:
This is a rough hewn, ant infested six foot bench.
Further inspection reveals the carvings of many a hot sweat soaked wait.
Apparently Oksana and Valda were here in 2018, hope they didn’t need to be Russian home...
Its nine forty six and I’m writing this in real time.. I have plenty to do keeping the ants off my feet,and the insects off my head and face.
I foolishly asked what time the plane was due, only to be told “today”.
I wish I had some of Rita’s cake, as I am sure a piece laid out would at first entice the ants and subsequently overload them. Therefore freeing me from their pester age.
Ten thirty....
Ten thirty one...
Ten thirty one and forty two seconds....
Eleven......
Eleven thirty and no sign of a plane, the day is now hot, I’ve got a shirt stuck to me and I am getting an impending sense of deja vu.
After a previous trip experience waiting on or for Bush planes not being a good one, I now dread to think when this one will arrive.
Meanwhile the bugs continue to feed...... On me.
Twelve thirty reveals a plane.. Of sorts... After a quick load up of the luggage, me and a thousand refugee ants boarded the aircraft.
Dozed a bit and soon landed in Ogle Airport to the sight of miserable faces on the check through and internal customs.
No one smiles..
At the hotel I was greeted by not a sea view from my window, but two pairs of red Brazilian panties pinned to wall.. Not sure what this would signify..
I’ll let you form your own opinion.
I decided not to go out much today as the previous evening there had been a shooting at a local petrol station.. One man shot in the foot one in the head.. One dead.. One with a bad foot.. It’s a dangerous place is Georgetown.. This is sadly not an isolated occurrence.
With no social safety net crime is rife and life is cheap.
Couple this with being close to the cocaine producing capital of the world you get a next to lawless society where bribes and bullets talk louder than police and courts.
Soon I was ready to be picked up and escorted to the airport, I won’t miss the food but I have had a very memorable trip.
Next year I wonder if I will revisit Guyana.... Or look to pastures new.
If I come back here I’m bringing some pot noodles.
An arduous voyage home included a 14 hour wait in Miami airport.. You could not tell you were in America.. Just about everyone is speaking Spanish.. Apparently its the Cuban influence.. Florida is choked full with Cuban refugees.
Arrival home is somewhat sobering, but at the same time comforting.
Glad to be back I set off for Thornaby.
Finis.